Term of the Day: retirement shuffle

retirement shuffle--when an elderly head starts taking lots of days off as he or she get closer to retirement.

Overheard Stagehand Line #35: "I've never knowingly hired..."

Broadway Head: "I've never knowingly hired an ass-kisser, but maybe one or two have slipped in."

Term of the Day: juiced in

juiced in--newfound power, new perks from being in a prominent position. "The box office will take care of you. You're juiced in now that you are a head."

Slogan of the Day: "Time to make the donuts"

"Time to make the donuts"--start of the call, especially an early morning one. From the old Dunkin' Donuts commercial with the exhausted baker getting up for work.

Term of the Day: personality-free

personality-free-- having no personality, a boring soul. "Though the TV actor did a great job onstage, backstage he was personality-free when it came to interacting with the crew."

Term of the Day: conversational headlock

conversational headlock--when a co-worker talks too much and won't let you get a word in. "Working with Jimmy is like being in a conversational headlock all day."

Term of the Night: running in with my hair on fire

running in with my hair on fire--last-minute shopping experiences for daily TV shows. "I ran into Macy's with my hair on fire, desperate to buy 10 silver casseroles for 'The Tonight Show.'"

Term of the Day: "Living the dream"

"Living the dream"--said when doing work that is particularly filthy or boring.

Term of the Day: "If you like him, invite him to dinner"

"If you like him, invite him to dinner": When two stagehands are engrossed in conversation at the expense of working, the crew chief might yell, "If you like him, invite him to dinner," so they go back to work.

Term of the Day: "You're welcome as a guest, but I don't need a roommate"

"You're welcome as a guest, but I don't need a roommate"--a crusty old house carpenter said this to a roadman who was trying to move into his office for the run-of-show. The roadman then built a primitive office for himself in the basement.

Term of the Day: show-and-tell situation

show-and-tell situation--after a bad accident on deck, when scenery or a large prop is damaged, someone may say, "You have to see the damage. It is a show-and-tell situation."

Term of the Day: white on rice

white on rice--to guard somebody closely, to not leave them alone. "When the young designer came on deck during the load in and tried to do work onstage, a stagehand was assigned to cover her, like white on rice."

Term of the Day: "Put your coat on and go home"

"Put your coat on and go home"--said when a stagehand really screws up, he or she is done. "Don't worry about your fuck up, just put your coat on and go home."

Term of the Day: pure stagehandese

pure stagehandese--stagehand slang, a stagehand who is conversant in the slang used by Local #1 stagehands. Often generational stagehands, whose fathers or grandfathers were in Local #1. I find that many stagehands under 50 don't understand what a busted valise is. "One of the extra men in the carpentry department speaks the purest stagehandese I have ever heard."

Term of the day: horse-trading

horse-trading--shrewd or harsh bargaining to achieve a better deal

Historical Place of the Day: Polish Tea Room

Polish Tea Room--Edison Cafe, closed by the greedy landlords of the Edison Hotel at the end of 2014. Famous for its mixed clientele, including stagehands, producers and playwrights. Neil Simon used to eat there. Its matzah ball soup was famous. The name is a takeoff on the hoity-toity Russian Tea Room. The Edison was finally replaced by a more high-end restaurant named Friedman's, where the food is supposed to be pretty good.

Term of the Day: parsing the Talmud

parsing the Talmud--trying to hash out a difficult intellectual questions, sometimes where the answer changes due to circumstances.  Intense scholarly work that takes years to master. "Sometimes figuring out the meal penalties is like parsing the Talmud." The Talmud is a collection of Jewish religious writings that scholars spend their lives studying.

Term the Day: It's kosher

It's kosher--it's okay, it is within the rules or what is acceptable.  "It's kosher to fix props during the preset, but it is not kosher for the designer to ever do work on deck." Keeping kosher is part of the Jewish religious dietary laws. Observant Jews eat kosher food that has been produced in facilities that have been inspected by rabbis and are following religious laws on food.

Overheard Stagehand Line #33: "I'll work beside you, but never for you."

Young Stagehand to Famously Nasty Head: "I'll work beside you, but never for you."

Term of the Day: Old Faithful

Old Faithful--a stagehand well-known for exploding in temper tantrums, at similar times of the day or under similar work conditions every time.

Term of the Day: carnival rides

carnival rides--during the preset, short rides on automated pieces by understudy actors or actors being put in a role to get  them used to automation so they can do the show. Saves money on a put-in rehearsal, which requires full crew (except frontlights).

Overheard Stagehand Line #32: "Some guys think if they have one guy in the theater to hate, they are doing good."

"Some guys think if they have one guy in the theater to hate, they are doing good." It is the old-school process of picking another stagehand to direct your rage and anger at, usually for the length of the run or for many years.