Term for a Hard Day: to do the heavy lifting

to do the heavy lifting- -a day or period of hard work (unloading trucks, carrying couches to the fifth floor)..."we had some heavy lifting to do," "We already did the heavy lifting.”

Perils of Stagehanding: to get dinged

to get dinged--to get hit, usually on the head

Respect for the Old Timers: "When the scenery was made out of wood and the men were made out of steel"

"When the scenery was made out of wood and the men were made out of steel"--mocking line when an older stagehand starts telling a story about how tough stagehands used to be. "Wheels hadn't even been invented yet when I started in the business, sonny."

Term of the Moment: underminer

underminer--stagehand who will undermine other members of the crew for personal advancement or because he/she can't help him or herself.

Term of the Whiny Moment: Debbie Downer

Debbie Downer-- constant complainer. SHOULD be used for both sexes. Based on the old SNL skit.

Term of the Day: Anecdotage

anecdotage--nonmedical explanation for the condition of an older stagehand who tells the same five stories over and over again, usually with him/her as the hero/heroine of the story or airing old grievances, often with most people in the story dead or retired.

Term of the Moment: fluffer

fluffer--prop person who is skilled with fabric goods (drapes, pillows and bedspreads). Has different meaning in porn world.

Term of the Moment: Busted valise

Busted valise: This is probably the great indigenous Broadway term. A valise is an old name for a small suitcase A busted valise is a screw up, a wounded soul, somebody who has been severely damaged and is not coming back whole. The term can also be used as an adjective, like a busted-valise local, where the local is full of screw ups. I met a famous head, who had been forced to retire because of two injuries. I asked her how she was doing, and she said, "Ah, I'm a busted valise." TV stagehands don't know this term, and it is hard to find a Broadway stagehand under 50 who knows it.

Memory of the Day--"I came from the back of a truck."

"I came from the back of a truck"--No matter where you wind up in the stage industry, the vast majority of us started by unloading trucks.

Prudent Move of the Moment: "Get adult supervision."

"get adult supervision"--find a supervisor, a head or even a designer to detail the work that has to be done. When a small crew of extra men need direction, sometimes a loudmouth in the group will start barking out orders. A saner head might say, "Let's get adult supervision," meaning to get the person responsible for the project to sign off on it or to explain what has to be done.

Line of the Moment: "Fuck the road, this is Broadway."

"Fuck the road...this is Broadway"...standard response to a roadman who repeatedly bleats "This is how we did it on the road."

Term of the Day: button job

button job--to run automation

Composer Scorn: (to) Wildhorn someone

(to) Wildhorn someone--The main Broadway reviewers for the New York Times hate the composer Frank Wildhorn, so his musicals always get savaged. Repeated vicious reviews about the same composer or playwright by the same reviewer means that the artist has been Wildhorned.

Acronym of the Day: STW

STW--"straight to wardrobe." When an actor or an actress slays at an audition and gets the role, the casting agent or director might write on his/her resume, "STW," meaning the job is theirs, measure them for a costume.

Term of the Moment: staged reading

staged reading--when talent, often named talent, gives a reading with scripts for potential producers. A staged reading happens before the workshop is greenlighted.

Term of the Day: stagehand bush telegraph

stagehand bush telegraph--how gossip gets around in the theater district. See also: "Telephone, telegram, tell a stagehand."

The Art of Carrying: Four bag

four bag--four men on a piece ("Let’s four bag the piece.”)

Annals of Overacting: pulling focus

pulling focus--when an actor makes large gestures or overacts, they may succeed in shifting the audience's focus to him or her, away from main action of the scene.

Term of the Day: black cloud

black cloud: a perpetually miserable stagehand, where no amount of overtime or meal penalties will ever bring a smile to his or her face.

Orchestra Term of the Day: clown car

clown car: a Broadway conductor friend of mine calls his small pit of 11 musicians the clown car. "I have to check in on the clown car," he said, as he went back into the pit. The reference is to the old circus gag of cramming many clowns into a tiny vehicle.

Term of the moment: break your chops

break your chops--to make fun of someone, sometimes harmless, sometimes malicious.

Term of the Day: battlefield conditions

battlefield conditions--during the brutal production period, repairs are made with materials at hand and props are built and scenery rehashed in the alleys of theaters, often during the freezing winter. Sometimes miracles are pulled off in primitive conditions. When asked why a certain decision during production was made, you can mutter "battlefield conditions."

Term of the moment: the Great Land Grab

the Great Land Grab--when the different departments during a load in grab different areas of the basement or other available places of the theater to store their road boxes, put chairs and tables, as well as to make sleeping berths. As a rule, wardrobe tends to grab most of the basement, the heads tend to have their own offices and the stagehands who work for the theater might have a crew room. The remaining space is usually divvied up among the contract stagehands, who work for the show. Often, the stagehand working the hardest, like the contract carpenter, will get screwed out of marking out space because he or she is trapped on deck during much of the production period while the choice spaces are being grabbed.

International Term of the Day: pendejo

pendejo--dumbass, (lit. pubic hair, Mexican slang) This term comes from a very talented, fiery star dresser from "Victor/Victoria," who if you got in her way, would bowl you over snarling "Pendajo!"

Term of the Night: "good union man"

good union man--upholds works rules, supports union over corrupt practices that would result in personal enrichment. My friend and fellow Onesy Jay Silverstein died on January 3rd at 57. He'd retired two years before with the classic stagehand complaints, including a bad back and busted feet. He moved to Florida and did a lot of fishing, but died after a short battle with brain cancer. That is what I can say about him, that Jay was a good union man. Rest in Peace, Jay.

Term of the Day: toasters

toasters--automated scenic elements that pop out of the deck whose tops are flush with the deck and disguised so that they are a surprise to the audience. May have a flip up lids like the snowbanks at "Gentleman's Guide to Love and Murder" or may have tops that are painted the same as the show deck like the in-deck door units at "Jersey Boys."

Term of the Day: theatrical herpes

theatrical herpes: glitter, sparkles or small pieces of confetti. When glitter is used in set painting, it is like theatrical herpes, meaning that it never goes away, no matter how much you vacuum or sweep. The same can be said for mylar confetti, small pieces of paper confetti or fake snow. "Glitter is like theatrical herpes," said the scenic artist.

Term of the Night: road dog

road dog--stagehand who sleeps around on the road.

Term of the Day: put-in rehearsal

put-in rehearsal--rehearsal for new lead or actor going into show, usually using costumes (at least for the new actor) and automation, with most of the crew called in.

Term from the Wardrobe Department: "Diva Las Vegas"

“Diva Las Vegas”—pejorative term applied by a wardrobe supervisor to a female lead with a long list of complaints. 

Term of the Moment: "clear for talent"

"clear for talent"--sarcastic and usually friendly term used when actors are walking through a group of stagehands.

Term of the Day: brick in the wall

brick in the wall--to ignore existence of another person in the theater (“From now on, he’s another brick in the wall,” said the head carpenter.)